Ha ha. obviously NOT looking forward to it. i mean, like, seriously not. i hate waking up early in the morning, plus, school can be a drag most of the time, and my class is hot, i mean, the real meaning of "hot", so that's why i live for weekend. deal with it.

Good morning. it's 10.24 AM, the sky outside looks even and the sun beams brightly, so brightly that the colour of the sky appears to be white, not blue. it looks like i'll be spending this Wednesday at home and the day will become uneventful as always.

if i don't count the weekend, this is my third day of holiday. to absolutely tell you the truth, i love holiday. i really really love holiday that words alone can't describe it and my fondness can't be scaled. my mood is almost always in a good state whenever i'm in holiday. especially early holiday, i love love love it that i eager to ask for an endless one. and if 'long holiday' were a person, i think i would marry that guy. haha just kidding, that's so hyperbole. ah holiday the love of life. God, please slower the time so that the holiday would feel very long. and i don't mind holiday's boredom as long as i've got a very long holiday.

you know, i actually want to rant more about my love for holiday but let's keep the track up.

yesterday, i had a Dillemma Day. seriously. the morning was usual though until i got a phone call from Cindy inviting me to join her to Plaza Senayan. i agreed since i didn't have any redeeming plan. the others couldn't join us with their own errands and reasons. but she said she only could be hanging out until around 5 whereas in me, i had to stay until evening to be picked up. duh that made me lazy. that meant i had to break-fasting alone there. it'd be better off stay at home, i thought. i was extremely confused. i cancelled the offer which gave me the hard feeling. but then came a text-message from my ex-classmate saying that a 10th grade break-fasting together would be held yesterday at the same location. so after giving it some contemplation, i decided to join the both's offers.
in afternoon i wandered with Cindy around Plaza Senayan. first, Kinokuniya. there was this hilarious banana character named Banao and his face made a good laugh! there were the stickers, pens with dolls on the top, and clear holders. i freaking wanted to buy but then forgot about it! argh damn. next time, i'll make myself sure to buy the sticker. and blah, we were getting bored because i couldn't eat due to my fasting while she could. i was kinda fed up and it's still three hours to go. we were really having nothing to do since the only option left was eat. well, we might as well catch the movie but we felt lethargic. and there went the second dillemma. she offered to go to PIM because there's more to do there. i, again, was so damn puzzled to choose between go there or stay to attend the 10th grader outing. everything mixed up and my condition didn't really sustain me well. after a long thought, alright, i went to PIM and filled with hard feelings to my ex-classmate, cancelled the class outing. it couldn't be helped anyway. i hoped it was a wise decision and i supposed it's a choice that would lead me to good. and blah, day passed eventually. yesterday was quite tiring but not bad anyway.

and now i'm starving already. oh i've got another dillemma right now! my father gave me a cool agenda with 2010 calendar and now i'm perplexed to use it this year or next year since it says '2010'. agh how come this kind of thing can be so confusing.

anyways, i'm going to do many things at home today. studying, drawing, learning Photoshop, playing games, napping, and break-fasting. i hope time moves sooo sloooww. huh, what's this? the sky suddenly turns out to be more gloomy. i hate. oh whatever. laters!

Friday night. the moment i've been waiting for. though to be honest, it's a bit unusual for me to say this but i kinda can't believe that it's this day already. tonight marks an ephemeral freedom for us, at least for students. it'll be more than two weeks but i consider it fairly short. well i am so damn excited about holiday. no doubt. but it's very dissapointing that once we hit the school again, the end-time of school will be back to the damned normal. i sorta like the school's schedule time lately. it ended by noon. is it not great?

i'm beat right now because i've been taking my eyes straight to television and monitor and i hate the fact that my eyes wear out quite fastly. but i still want to spend my time in front of my monitor. i don't know. there is this something from friday night that keeps me awake even if nothing good really happens, or even if i've got maximum sleepiness and although i've got to wake up at 3 in morning tomorrow. i know i'm forcing myself but i can't help it. too bad.

by the way, my motivation has been severed partly. that's the worst. well, not entirely, but still. lately i find myself highly lazy to study though in the middle of it, worrying future. dude, i urgently need a jolt of motivation.

quite recently i've been taking my time learning photoshop and abandoning studying. that kinda scares me alright. that's why i really need to be motivated more. but at least i've understood photoshop more than before, but, you know, still need a damn good tutorial. working by myself toward it can be totally exhausting i must say. but all of my friends who are nearly pro with it acknowledged theirselves learning it by their own efforts and i must admit that i'm very well amused.

anyway, i've made a decision just about a minute ago. i'm going to use this holiday very wisely and carefully. like, hibernating, and balancing between playing and studying. needless to say, mid-semester examinations will be taking place right several days after holiday ends. oh Allah, make the time goes veeeryyy slow i beg you.

and, my bad, before i started writing this entry, i've planned already of what i'm going to write here but, just a moment ago, i forgot about it. such issue that fears me.

hey i'm surprised that it's still 10.55 PM. i thought it's already more than 11 or perhaps almost 12. in this current states of mine; sleepy, exhausted, and all, i've really got to hit the pillow, long pillow, bed, blanket, air conditioner, and dream. so yeah. until next post, guys. get a well rest and good friday night.

Got this so-called tag game, or is it named "meme"? whichever. from

ulilulelo. must admit that i love this kinda game.

by the way, it's been edited. just realized after opened it for the second time, this cut is a total mess! oh and i kinda have edited minor part of the content, kay.

 
HAVE YOU EVER LIED TO GET OUT OF WORK?
i have no recollection. prolly have never. i'm not good at lying.

WHAT KIND OF BOOKS DO YOU READ?
comics and novels. the comics had better be amusing, and not cheesy. and i usually read horror/mystery fantasy novels. my novels are all those genres.

WHAT ARE SOME GOALS YOU WOULD LIKE TO ACHIEVE IN THE NEXT TEN YEARS?
does ten years mean after college? yeah well, i so want to take multiple-jobs haha. illustrator, graphic designer, and logo designer. and i had better be succesful and work abroad! amen.

WHAT'S REALLY CREEPY?
the surroundings beneath sea's surface, lizards, Indonesian ghosts.

WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH?
not a crush. i only adore them. well that'd be Robb Maclean, J.D Cronise, Chris Carraba.

WHAT'S YOUR CURRENT FANDOM/OBSESSION/ADDICTION?
long-holiday, autumn, illustrator, logo, foods, favorite bands, etc.

WHAT SONG GETS STUCK IN YOUR HEAD MOST OFTEN?
it comes in varies actually. but some of the times the song could be very annoying! recently, a song by Pinback with the title Byzantine is the one that oftenly stucks at my head. however, it's a good song so yeah i don't mind.

WHAT'S YOUR FAV FOODS THAT YOU EAT OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND NOT GET BORED OF?
Fish & Co, Sushi Tei, Beard Papa, honey.

WHAT WEBSITES DO YOU ALWAYS VISIT WHEN YOU GO ONLINE?
Mangafox, Livejournal, Facebook, Twitter.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT?
my friends' treat yesterday at Fish & Co. damn that sucked my saving!

WHAT TALENT (WHICH YOU THINK YOU DON POSSESS) DO YOU WISH TO HAVE
hexing through witchcrafts and everything related to sorcery. haha. well the simple ones are : exceed in English, Photoshop, Corel. and i want to have a great scores and intelligence too.

WHAT SUPER POWER WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE?
oops. have said it before! but i can make a huge list of it.
- magic
- rewind time
- time-travelling (is it even a superpower?)
- read people's mind

WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN?
Cancer

DO YOU WANT TO LEARN ANOTHER LANGUAGE
Indonesia and English are adequate for me. but i do really want to exceed in English so i've been trying to improve.

5 THINGS YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT
ulilulelo nearly answered all of my answers!
- people
- foods and drinks
- musics (that includes my ipod)
- my cell phone
- money (not to mention this got to be at lowest of the list!)

IF YOU COULD MEET ANYONE NOW, WHO WOULD YOU MEET?
someone who's friggin pro at Photoshop and Corel. help! oh and someone who can teach me sciences and math.

WHAT'S YOUR DREAM JOB?
wizard/sorcerer. and the more real-life ones are illustrator, graphic designer, graphic novelist, and logo designer. ultimate aims!

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO?
looooooooooooong holiday. and graduation. seriously, i'm suffocating here of senior year. at least when every "things" are done very quickly.

SAY SOMETHING TO THE PERSON WHO TAGGED YOU
let's open-fasting together. and go to Puncak is a good idea.

oh i've got dinner waiting on the dining table. so yeah, gotta go. by the way, tomorrow is Monday and i hate Monday and i don't want to go to school and i'm never tired of repeating that words. some issue i'm having, huh?
 

What to start? there are lot of things i want to write here. guess i'll separate it into two posts because i want to finish this right away. man, i'm tired. yet, i want to Livejournal-ing. let's start anyway.

afternoon, likely 2 PM. i got back home in a sleepy state and hit the bed with upper uniform still wore on. it was just like an ordinary afternoon and i thought so too. so i was unconcious until a quarter to 3 PM. i woke up and found myself need a preparing, because at 3 PM i had a cram school. so, yeah, i changed and set my books and bag. while i was standing in front of my desk, preparing, i heard a strange blaring sound from outside. the sound was really clear so it might've not been too far. almost similar as thunder's sound but strangely, since it was sunny. in a real sudden i moved backward all by myself before my knowing. having a really bad feeling, i remained silent to feel what will become more and yes, it was an earthquake. a hard one. then i rapidly went outside of my bedroom and there went another wave. wow what a big sensation having it at 19th floor! the movement was distinctly seen and felt. for that moment, there were only me and my house caretaker inside. my house caretaker was even more panic and shouted frightened, which gave me the thrill more than before. i ran outside to the corridor and found the other corridor's ceilling was a bit crumbling and falling to floor. i was quite panic i must admit, and ran inside my bedroom as fast as i could to grab my bag and cell phone. and then an announcement was broadcasted throughout the floor's speaker. as fastly me, my house caretaker, and other neighbors ran through the emergency exit. well we had to go down from 19th floor to the ground using stairs. it wasn't really felt to me. nervousness wins all. i got tired at 6th floor instead. so, everybody had gotten outside of the building. and my cell phone was having no network at all. good one. i couldn't contact my parents. well after quite a long time, it appeared and i took a taxi to get to my cram school. me and the taxi driver chatted about how crazy and dangerous the earthquake was. the road along was getting crowded too, everyone had gone outside to save theirselves. my neighborhoods are all buildings and high-rises so it's indeed dangerous should there be an earthquake.

so i got to my cram school and things went like usual. nothing really special or anything. after it'd done, me and my four other cram-school-mates (the three of them are my schoolmates) went to Pizza Hut to open-fasting. i've been wanting pizza for a week. i'm not used at wanting pasta though. and at evening i got picked up by father and went to Citos to pick up my mother. blah, things went and all. we chatted in the car and my father said that buildings are more firm than houses in earthquake's case. good to know. gave me the relief but still i was scared to take a bath or sleep. well and here i am, story-telling.

that's it for the big news. moving on to the writing list.

so, let me tell you about this. i've kinda gotten the hang of my class already. and seriously, i've still been sitting alone but i don't let that bother me. in fact, i can sit with various people. and to tell you the truth, i don't have a close friend in the class (if i say that "close", then it means best friend or something) but i do still talk and laugh with people, although, honestly, not extremely often. but there's a classmate of mine who always critizes me. that person oftenly berates my behavior of why i don't want to socialize with others. pfft what the hey! i'm not lonely, i do still socializing with others, people still talk and laugh with me, and all. that's only in your eyes. that person doesn't know me at all. it's only a matter of timing. i believe it is (i will still do my best though). that aside, being a senior means having an ultimate priority of life; future. well, college to make it easier. but, darn this, i'm feeling awfully lethargic to schooling.

i've noticed that many Livejournal friends of mine have frozen from journaling activity. kinda sad if i think about it since it's getting quieter here.

gotta sleep. wish me the very best safety. later.

I don't know why but i've been trying to post something ever since almost a week ago but in the middle of the writing, the idea froze and the will broke. i try not to right now though. let's go (?)

first thing to say is, okay i know maybe almost all of you are tired of me blabbering again about this topic, or don't even care (i'm totally fine with it) but let me write this down. this is so fricken important, at least for me.

i think i'm having a change of decision. well, correction, not "i think", but i am having. as i've mentioned by the previous posts that my aim was Aeroplane Engineering or the sort, now it's changed. my first priority is Visual Communication Designing (am i saying it correctly?). to explain it really shortly, it's a major with fields concerning mass media advertising, movie making and all that relate to. i'm interested especially in logo designing and illustrating for i enjoy those stuffs and i'd like to realize it (well i still want to learn other material in the same field too of course!). and i've kinda considered that i have nearly absolutely no talent toward physics, let alone forming an aeroplane. i only admired it all that time. knowing it partly hurts, but partly relieves me. at that time i'd always contemplated whether that was my pure decision i'd thought so deeply or not but now that i've come up with it, i think this very one is suitable enough for me. however, i'm afraid ever something breaks it down once more. dear Allah, bless upon me. amen. it greatly decides my future.

i'm planning to buy a book of logo in Kinokuniya but since it costs quite a fortune, i've got to save and it takes time. you know i'm not really good at saving.

okay so that's that. next on my writing plan list. currently in fasting month. every Moslem performs it. i did fasting by the first day, but not for the time being since i'm having my period. ugh i don't like paying fasting-debts. the first day of fasting month was simply a torture i must say. seriously, enduring hunger is way way easier than enduring anger. there were lot of ordeals i should face. everyone appeared to piss me off badly. i couldn't really bear the anger and that made me frustrated and all. it felt like i was going to explode or something. oh Allah so knows our weaknesses.

okay next. i just made Twitter. not "just made" to be actual, but i just announced it here right now. i've made it several days ago. at first i didn't lay any interest toward it but no sooner i then contemplated to try. i'm not used telling my current condition, for instances, where i am, with who, etc. but more to my thoughts. add if you wish. my username is malfiore.

by the way, this week is prolly a bad week for me. i loathe this week. many events made me aggravated. i need to take a long breather. i've been busy too lately. you know, school and all that craps.

lately i found myself browsing many photos taken from my previous class and guess what. i extremely miss them right now. i miss the good old times so fricken much. i too miss them that i can't scale how much i miss them by words. i want my current class be substituted with my 11th grade or 10th grade class.

phew finally i write. i guess that's it. as far as i concern, i believe there are still some things i planned to write. oh well, it can be done by the next post. today is Friday night and i love it big time. but alas, i can't sleep late and oversleep like i did usually in the past because there's a cram school from morning to noon every Saturday. aw crap this. i'm getting seriously exhausted of things. and wow it's 11.21 PM already? i can't seem to believe the fact. i've got to wake early. ergh i hate waking up so early. well, off i go. have a very decent Friday night.